Read My Email!

Curious about what other people have to say about The Fic Bitch? Yeah, well, me too. All of my comments are in italics. Nothing is edited unless it contains personal information, is not relevant to the site, or contains suggestions that end up elsewhere on the page. Newest emails are at the top. And most importantly: I did not make these up.

I got so many emails that I had to add a second page! To read my earliest emails, click HERE.


Finally! I have searched far and wide for the Ultimate Bitch and I have found her! LOL.

It was nice to find a site that tells it like it is without pleasantries or wishy-washy critiques. I'm tired of having to scour through ASMR in search of good fanfiction and being bombarded with stories written by teeny-boppers who decided that they'd try to write a story about Darien and Serena after having watched only one episode of Sailor Moon.

I couldn't, however, help but bang my head on my keyboard after going through your "fics that don't suck page." You see, I found most of the stories that you listed on that page but I did so only AFTER having to suffer through all that other crap floating around ASMR. It makes me nauseous just thinking that I could have saved my time and energy had I found your site sooner. [It was like finding diamonds in a sea of crap!]

Love the ranting, raving and overall bitchiness and I hope that you keep the e-mail page updated.

Oh and going through your "you know you've written..." turned out to be a guilty pleasure of mine. I found myself applying many of your statements to my fanfiction. Then again, I wrote it back when I was a sophomore in high school (I'm now 21) and I think I'm going to go back and edit and revise it. So you see, you ARE changing the world, one bad author at a time!

Keep up the good work and, by the way, nice message board.

Bravo to you senorita,


P.S. Wreaker's MSTs are especially amusing...I was happy to see that she knocked Pandora off her pretentious pedestal. I mean, I like "The Rose Garden" (which hasn't seen an update since Y2K) but as far as WORSHIPPING her...muah ha ha ha! It tickled my funny bone when I saw that.

She probably has autographed head shots ready for her fans. LOL.

Oh no. Look out! Wreaker's ego is going to explode!


I like this site alot. My favoite authors are Lady Jupiter, His Lordship Chaos, Makoto Almasy, and Kouri. They wrote Jupiter fics and I love Jupiter. I noticed most of your authors write for asmr. It is now not .com. Well bye for now!



Okay, I was looking at this 'ficbitch' site and supposedly, you are an acomplished flamer. So... let's see some flames shall we?

The end of that email. Okee... And then a few moments later...

Well, I'm bored, with not enough time on my hands, so I think I'll play "English Teacher with not enough common sense to avoid a severe lambasting" Anyways, I was reading your example flame on ficbitch, and felt like commenting. Hmm... Let's see. Congratulations! You have reaffirmed why I have no faith in humanity. [blue]good entry[/blue] Your atrociously mind-numbing letter caused the intelligence of everyone who read your letter to drop by about 20 points. [blue]cliche', over-used expression[/blue] That would be if they could actually READ what you were saying, seeing as your spelling and grammar are so extraordinarily atrocious you make the great masters of English literature do somersaults in their respective graves. [blue]Again, the authors rolling in their graves has been used by every flamer and their mother[/blue] People like yourself are the reason the Darwin awards exist: because such immense inanity is a danger to mankind that far outstrips terrorism. I'll bet you would've voted for George W. Bush (idiot extraordinaire) had you not been holed up in your room, listening to the Backside Boys croon incessantly (and off-key) while crying because you have no friends, no life, and no brains whatsoever. [blue]Ooh, nicely vicious[/blue] Quantity does not constitute quality. If Princess Destiny's fans are all like you, then I will get down on my knees and pray to the Divine Stars above that I am not one of them. And if I am your definition of a loser, it is a title I will wear proudly until that fateful day on which we will all be judged and you will be judged too stupid to go to Heaven because you might infect it with Britney Spear's [blue] it should be Spears'[/blue] wretched influence or the like. Basically, I don't give a flying fuck what you think because you are nothing but another sheep in a cesspool of aggrandized corruption. As you can tell, I am of a finer mettle. You may read my fanfiction at and see for yourself. Sincerely, Someone Who REALLY Doesn't [blue]nice name[/blue]

The HELL? I didn't even WRITE that.... I'm not even going to TRY to understand this.


I love the site. especially rants about bad fics and raves/rants. I admit i am using one of the "been there/done that"plots. (i.e. Sailor Moon has a horrible argument with the other Scouts-sorry I'm used to the dub names-fakes her death and runs to America). Tuxedo Will talks about that and he says that he has no problem with it, but with people having Serena or whoever suddenly, as in, two to four lines later, speak English fluently and already have a steady income. I at least put in NINE YEARS LATER to imply that she worked to where she currently is. as for coming up with dub names for outer and the Starlights, I'm guilty as well. Amara and Michelle seem to be acceptable, but I coined Tara and Susan for Saturn and Pluto. I also came up with Steven, Yaeger and Tom/Travis (?) for the Lights. however I like to share my tales with you and look forward to either having them posted or critiqued. it'll be fun to submit. peace out.

Submissions? Tuxedo Will says? I think I'm missing something.


Dear Fic Bitch,

The bad news: While your glossary says that the Chaosfics written by the avatar don't exist... I'm afraid one does. Vampire Princess Michiru.

Worse News: That fic was too much fun to write. His Lordship Chaos & Greenbeans can be evil & encouraging at the same time.

As for your list of original ideas for SM fics, I remember a suggestion I shot off at some guy who had done a "Guide for Writing Sailor Moon Fics" that was (intentionally) a piece of junk. The suggestion involved a visit from Luna's cousin, Ki-Li, the tiger from China. (So she's the runt of the litter. :P)

Nice page, boss. When Chaos sent out his rants on avatars, he mentioned you and I finally got around to surfing by. Pardon me while I check out your forum now.

There's just something about getting praise from people that you know of that makes a gal feel all warm and fuzzy.


i red ur site n I wnt u 2 kno dat u r soo MEEN! ur terible 2 all da autors ho put alot o wrk nto mackin der fix reely kool n u BASH DEM! rUnway fix r REELY wickid and Princess Destiny is da KOOLIST autor evr!!!! U r a fu*kin looser! evrybudy LUVS her fix n if u cant c dat den U SU*K!!! i bet u cant doo ass gud ass her!!!!! I HATE U!!!!!!!!!!! U SHULD DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ROFLMAO! And this wins the prize for being the most hilarious flame I have EVER received. It was so inane that even WREAKER refused t MST it! I sincerely hope it was a prank flame, because I fear for anyone who writes this. Cherry Pie/Eternal Angel DID MST it, however. I'll post it later.


Anyhow, hi, I followed a link from the Godawful Fanfiction MB and let me tell you, I agree with you 95%. It made my day after having to scan through seemingly endless crap (SilverRunningWater89 anyone?). Keep up the good work.

This guy has the double distinction of being visitor number 10,000 to my website as well as having the SN "The Masked Asshole." How cool of a screen name is THAT?

Most of this email is commenting on my abundance of dead links - of which there are many as of December, 2002. Doubly more so now that is now, so I'll just cut to the random praise and adoration part.


FINALLY a group of people who recognize the horror that is PuD's fanfiction. I also know that PuD is a title not meant to be thrown to every person I know. I've told only one person, a friend in IRL, who knows nothing of anything, and can therefore say nothing that would go anywhere.

I won't even go into what bein on her ML is like, other than to say the wierd crap posted there is humerous.


Your site manages to be utterly amusing and yet useful at the same time. Evil=Good. (Er, wait...) The one thing that I will dispute to the day I die is that present tense is bad. Present tense is your FRIEND. I'm not just saying that because I have a fic written in present tense; some of my favorite works of fiction are in present tense. Granted, almost all of those are in first person, which you didn't mention.... Anywho, very, very funny site, really. Go you. Er... yeah.

Present tense is NOT my friend. It pulls my hair and I make it cry.