The Orgy

Sailor Gay

When it comes to the obligatory orgy fic, I actually thought to myself, “What fic do I think of when I think of Lesbian orgies?” The answer to that is Sean Gaffney’s “State of Love and Trust”

I cannot use Sean Gaffney’s State of Love and Trust for two reasons:

1)It is also the first fic I think of when I think of mind controlled sex slaves.

2) It is actually one of the better fics in the genre. (Which, admittedly, doesn’t say a lot when you consider that all porn is inherently bad by definition.) Erego, I cannot feature it. What with there being many others that are far, far worse. But dammit, props to Sean for writing a 10 person lesbian orgy that actually has a plot! Sure, it’s a contrived plot of What-The-Fuckery, but a plot nonetheless. Way to go, Sean!

So, I’m going to feature Sailor Gay instead.

It’s a short read. It’ll make you giggle. And it is the only fic on the entire ASMR archive to have been posted WITHOUT AN AUTHOR.

Which explains a lot if you think about it. NO ONE WROTE IT. Not even the mysterious “Unknown” wanted to put his name on this sucker. This fic just sort of… spontaneously generated itself. Possibly, someone got a lot of monkeys in a room and gave them each a typewriter and this pr0nfic came out. They gotta work their way UP to Hamlet, I suppose.

Or better yet, maybe it was a fic written by GOD and gifted to us from the heavens. For lo, God looked down upon the people and said, “Verily, there is not enough lesbian sex. I shall gift you with this shitty pr0nfic.” Yeah. Thanks a lot, God. You suck.

And so, our fic opens on a senshi meeting when Usagi makes a sudden declaration:

"I'm tired of all this bullshit. You all can say what you want but what I want to know is, who in here wants to get butt-naked and fuck me?"

You know, I do have to give this fic credit. At least it’s straight to the point and doesn’t bother with all of those silly things like foreplay and, well, basically just foreplay. Asking for a plot in a pr0nfic is like asking Robin Williams to be funny these days. Sometimes, he is, but mostly he's just obnoxious.

Well, anyway, Amy promptly replies, “Oooh! ME!” except, more timidly because she’s the stereotypical shy girl. And there’s a moment of shocked indignation from Mina, Lita, and Raye when suddenly they decide that yeah, they really want in on the action, too. Then there is much fucking to be had.

Lita ripped off her blouse and posed in the middle of the room. "I am Lita-Bi, champion of the lesbians of America! Thank you Sailor Moon, for helping me be proud of who I naturally am." She undid her bra and laid it softly on Serena's meatballs.

Why do I want to give Lita a sidekick and name her “The Unrepentent Bull-Dyke”? Also, Lita, dear... Serena's head is not a bra rack.

Then there are various orgy noises.

"More breast, damn it!"

Yum! Chicken!

Oh… wait. Nevermind.

And suddenly, their mad sexcapades are interrupted!

Haruka walked right into the house and leaped right into the middle of the heap of girls. Before anyone could say anything, she said, "I can smell pussy from anywhere! I just knew that you girls would show your true colors I'm so proud of you all!"

Haruka is truly a lesbian icon for us all. Men and women alike aspire to be the lesbian that she is.

Then Mina and Raye become assimilated by the Lesbian Sex Borg Collective:

At this point, Raye and Mina decided resistance to their sexual desires was futile, what with the pussy smell that was clouding the air around them.

And there is much cheering. Before sending us off, we’re left with one final thought from our Gay senshi:

Serena looked at a camera on the wall and said, "Isn't this great we are sailor GAY!"

"MOON LESBO POWER!!!" the others chanted in unison.

Most disturbing of all about this fic, is that for it being hentai, it’s TAME. On an explicit scale of 1-10, this is a four. Dammit, if you’re going to be writing a hentai, I want to see some bad euphemisms for body parts and hear about squirting “love juices” or something. I felt ripped off.

Some divine (most-likely troll) fic this was. Pfft.

Apparently, God thought so, too. "Sailor Gay" was followed up by another authorless wonder known as “Virgin Warrior”. On the bright side, THAT ONE doesn’t exist any longer.